I was reading a good book yesterday. I had to read fast because naps are only about 2.5 hours and I wanted to finish the book. I got pretty close, but Ty woke up and it was back to child rearing. I hope his parents don't mind me sharing a few things I have learned over the last few weeks tending their amazing boy.
But first, the book. I think it was called
The Mother in Me, I found it laying around. I loved the story towards the end. There were two sisters, one had three rowdy kids, including a new born, the other had tried for kids but had none yet. They were visiting when the mom opened up and talked about how she just needed to get groceries but she couldn't imagine taking the now three kids to the store. The sister is trying to be understanding and offers to stay and tend them for her. The mom then says
"I can't leave the baby, she will be hungry and I haven't pumped "
"then take her, I'll stay with the others"
"no, it's OK, I just wanted to complain a little about how trapped I feel"
They then talked about how they both envied the others life. They realized there wasn't much they could do about it and they said their good byes and the sister left the mom and her crying baby. After thinking about what she could do, she decided to go shopping!! She spent the day out trying on clothes, trying the free samples in the grocery store, picking out fresh produce and taking her time about it.
At first I was so shocked, but then she explains how she was thinking of her sister the whole time and hoped that she would love her kids and live it up for her. What a touching story for me! I realized that I do love my life.
I love sleeping all night uninterrupted.
I love heading to the mall for the afternoon, even if just to window shop.
I love reading a good book all day.
I love that I only sweep the kitchen every few months whether it needs it or not.
I love that I can leave my stuff laying around and no one bothers it.
I love that Brad and I can take off and see a movie or head to the beach anytime.
I love coming home to a lazy Sunday afternoon of naps and treats and visiting friends.
there are more, lots more...
I don't mean to make anyone feel bad. I just wanted to let everyone know that I am thoroughly enjoying our child free home, so you better be enjoying your kids and snugly babies for me!
Every time you get to take your kids to grandmas, or show off your cute baby to your mother-in-law. Every time they tell you they love you! Even every time they cry and you are the only one who can sooth them, just love it and think of those who don't have that experience.
Anyway, back to child rearing. After day after day of hanging out with Ty, I have had my patience tested and realized that I have more than I thought. I love that Ty tells himself "no, Tyler", and even, "no mouth" when he is putting something in his mouth that he shouldn't. I wanted to scold him somtimes and instead tickled him and gave him a hug.
He is a strong kid and a wiggler and when he doesn't want a diaper on it's near impossible to get it on him, but we got along great. He is the first to give you a hug after you wrestled him to the floor to get a diaper on, or a nose wiped.
I can no longer be judgmental of cleanliness. There are some things that just go the way of all the earth when kids are involved (hence being glad I only have to sweep quarterly). When your kid throws food and bowls and sippy cups and doesn't understand that that's not OK, things get a little sticky. (imagine spaghetty all over a 5-6 foot radius, thank goodness it didn't have red sauce on it!)
I also learned that poop is just poop and it won't kill you. This paricular boy has a colostomy bag, which means he poops into a bag out of his waist. Most of the time it is clean a tidy and even easier to change than a poopy diaper, but when it leakes, it really leaks!! We had an exciting afternoon when I noticed that he smelled like poop (which he never does, thanks to the tidy bags), I knew something was wrong and gathered a few supplies (new onsie, wipes, new diaper, new bag, new jammmies). I got him down and got him undressed, and realised that we had a bigger problem than I thought. Here I was holding down a wriggly boy covered in poop and I had no idea what do to so (glad for the cell phone in my pocket) I called both dad's phone and mom's phone and no one answered!! Ty was being very patient with me, but I really had no idea what to do. I finaly just decided that it was just poop and I would deal with it the best I could. I needed some more supplies, so I left Ty with strict commands to not move and went hunting for what I thought I needed. Ty was great and we did the best we could fixing him up. Dad came home thankfully and fixed him up the right way, but I was prety impressed that I had even tried instead of bursting into tears. I guess I am not as easily grossed out as I though I was.
I was prety impressed with myself when I had made it through the day and we were still happy and healthy and we had even been outside to play. But I am happy that Mom is back! I hope she had a great vacation. I am going to clean and then read a book all afternoon, maybe even outside in the sun, I hope everyone else is enjoying their life!